Green Onions

“Heyas cutie-pie,” said Lucy.

“Oh erm, hello,” said Red.

“Aint you just the cutest Fear,” said Lucy with a wink.

Red blushed. Always an impressive feat when your face is red. “Ooh, err, OK,” he stammered.

“Mmm, you’re sweet to look at,” grinned Lucy.

“Ahh err, thank you, your pretty yourself miss!” mumbled Red.

“You know, if you want to see more of me, for £20 I’ll show you every bit of my long luscious legs,” offered Lucy.

“Ooo… Yes please!” said Red, handing over a crisp £20 note.

“Mmm, thanks, darling,” winked Lucy as slowly slid her skirt up to a skull covered pair of stocking tops.

“Cooooooor!” gasped Red.

“You know if you want to see more, for £60 I’ll show you my lady lumps,” smiled Lucy.

“Oh yeah, That’s a bargain for them melons!” bobbled Red, handing over three more crisp £20 notes.

“Why thank ya,” said Lucy, before sliding her fingers under her shirt pushing it up her tummy, the fabric bunching under her fingers as it moves up her body before flicking her sweater up giving a quick flash of her twin assets.

“Coooooooor!” bounced Red.

“You know… For £200 I’ll show you where the babies are born,” smiled Lucy seductively.

“Oh yes! I’m so having some of that!” said Red, thumping his tail on the floor while handing over £200.

Lucy leaned in close, and in a far sexier voice than his narrator can manage, said: “thanks, darling, now for where babies are born.”

Red bounced from one foot to another as Lucy slid the £280 down her top. With a curtsey and a smile, she leaned into the ever more excited Red, pointed towards the window and said, “just over there, St James hospital maternity ward, Thanks for the money I’ll see ya around.”

Lucy then promptly exited the bar.

“Oh yeah,” said Red, “that’s where babies are born alright…”

A penny was heard dropping.

“Wait… OI!”

Originally written as a sketch for the old Tales of the Blue Moon. A Pre-Fears project. It was performed in Second Life to the soundtrack of Booker Ts Green Onions. I couldn’t think of a more apt scene for Red to encounter Lucy…

Eat our books:
Sponsor our Patreon:
Lick our course:
Drink our art prints & tees:


29 thoughts on “Green Onions”

    1. Thank you again. 🙂

      I’ll be honest, I really don’t mind the odd spelling mistake in my tales if they aren’t book bound.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s