Washing Machine

Grey Moon – Tuesday (ep. 15)

Reala poured four glasses of black rum. “So where are we and why am I the landlady of this bar?”

Fuen leant back on her stool. “Do you remember anything before you came here?”

“Bits and pieces,” replied Reala. “I know I had a life, but I don’t remember it.”

“You might not have had a life,” said Yuffie.

“I did,” affirmed Reala. “It’s just elusive in my memory. Like whether I turned the washing machine off at the plug last night.”

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Jessies Missus

Grey Moon – Tuesday (ep. 14)

Jessie wandered in and sat down in the comfy chair.

“Looking glum there, girl,” said Reala.

“Argued with the missus,” she replied.

“Oh dear,” said Reala. “What’s the problem?”

“Same old,” sighed Jessie. “She just doesn’t understand me.”

“Ah,” said Fuen, “what is she? French or something?”

Jessie sighed. “Rum please!”

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Tarot Cards

She shuffled the deck again. “What did you say your name was?”

“I didn’t,” he replied.

She smiled. Uneasy, she lay the tarot cards face-down a second time.

“My choice,” he said.

She nodded.

He reached over, flipping the third card. Death.

“Well, I guess I shoulda seen that coming,” she sighed.

Ashleigh over has written a cracker of a riff on this tale over on her blog ~ ashlesnob.wordpress.com

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Race Car

Grey Moon – Tuesday (ep. 13)

“Good grief, that’s loud!” yelled Reala, grabbing the television controller, and lowering the volume.

“What do we want?” chanted Fuen.

“Race car noises,” replied Yuffie.

“When do we want them?” chanted Fuen.

“Neeeeeeeooooooooooooowwww,” replied Yuffie.

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Going Down

He woke up. He was moving down. He banged his fists on the roof.

“Damn you!” he screamed. “Damn you!”

He fumbled in his pocket, found a matchbox, flicked out a match and struck it.

His vision blurred. He drew what air he could into his lungs.

Above him, in red felt-tip pen. ‘Tight arse couldn’t buy me a fancy coffin’.

Then sleep.

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Green Onions

“Heyas cutie-pie,” said Lucy.

“Oh erm, hello,” said Red.

“Aint you just the cutest Fear,” said Lucy with a wink.

Red blushed. Always an impressive feat when your face is red. “Ooh, err, OK,” he stammered.

“Mmm, you’re sweet to look at,” grinned Lucy.

“Ahh err, thank you, your pretty yourself miss!” mumbled Red.

“You know, if you want to see more of me, for £20 I’ll show you every bit of my long luscious legs,” offered Lucy.

“Ooo… Yes please!” said Red, handing over a crisp £20 note.

“Mmm, thanks, darling,” winked Lucy as slowly slid her skirt up to a skull covered pair of stocking tops.

“Cooooooor!” gasped Red.

“You know if you want to see more, for £60 I’ll show you my lady lumps,” smiled Lucy.

“Oh yeah, That’s a bargain for them melons!” bobbled Red, handing over three more crisp £20 notes.

“Why thank ya,” said Lucy, before sliding her fingers under her shirt pushing it up her tummy, the fabric bunching under her fingers as it moves up her body before flicking her sweater up giving a quick flash of her twin assets.

“Coooooooor!” bounced Red.

“You know… For £200 I’ll show you where the babies are born,” smiled Lucy seductively.

“Oh yes! I’m so having some of that!” said Red, thumping his tail on the floor while handing over £200.

Lucy leaned in close, and in a far sexier voice than his narrator can manage, said: “thanks, darling, now for where babies are born.”

Red bounced from one foot to another as Lucy slid the £280 down her top. With a curtsey and a smile, she leaned into the ever more excited Red, pointed towards the window and said, “just over there, St James hospital maternity ward, Thanks for the money I’ll see ya around.”

Lucy then promptly exited the bar.

“Oh yeah,” said Red, “that’s where babies are born alright…”

A penny was heard dropping.

“Wait… OI!”

Originally written as a sketch for the old Tales of the Blue Moon. A Pre-Fears project. It was performed in Second Life to the soundtrack of Booker Ts Green Onions. I couldn’t think of a more apt scene for Red to encounter Lucy…

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Limbo Jane

Grey Moon – Monday (ep. 10)

“Oh, wait. Was that the time you went on holiday with Jane?” laughed Fuen.

“Yeah, with the frazzled hair,” said Yuffie.

“Did you know she was once in a championship limbo team?” asked Fuen.

“Mmhmm,” replied Yuffie. “I was on her limbo team when we took the three-inch championship in the Bahamas.”

“Nice,” said Fuen.

“Yep, we go way back,” smirked Yuffie.

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Gum Smugglers

Grey Moon – Monday (ep. 9)

“I once got caught sneaking three hundred packets of bubblegum through customs,” moaned Reala.

“I once got caught smuggling twelve cases of Portuguese fortified wine into the country,” sighed Yuffie.

“Oh dear,” said Fuen. “Were you punished?”

“Yeah,” replied Yuffie. “I got deported.”

Silly mad late today. Pardon me. Somethings going up with LittleFears.co.uk as it’s currently a pain in the bottom to access it from the UK.

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Stone Archway

He sits down in the corridor, watching the rain coming down outside the archway. She hasn’t arrived.

He watches a middle-aged couple, crying, flowers in hand. He knows the feeling.

She still isn’t here. He’s getting frustrated now.

He reaches back and polishes the brass plaque with his name on.

She hasn’t come for 7 years, he doesn’t know why he thinks she’ll come today.

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