Tales of humour, whimsy and courgettes
“Splish splash,” she says, dancing through the puddles.
“Honey, stop that,” says her mother.
“But,” replies the girl.
“No buts,” snaps her mother.
“Splish splash,” says the girl’s reflection.
Keep ya eyes peeled for the competition announcement later on today!
“Well, I used to teach,” said Sprite.
“You were a teacher?” asked Fuen.
“Yeah, science, space and stuff,” said Sprite.
“What sorta stuff?” asked Fuen.
“Gravity,” said Sprite. “It was a weighty subject.”
Quite late posting today. Pardon me!
“She was banging on my door at 2 o’clock this morning,” grumbled Hydra.
“Good grief,” said Cloud.
“She was shouting, ‘for feck sake! Your music’s loud. Do you know what the time is?'” moaned Hydra.
“Ah,” said Cloud. “Did you know the time?”
“Yeah,” said Hydra, “a standard 4/4 rock beat.”
A quite literal, badaboomtish! 🙂
He woke. Headache pounding. Eyes sore. He threw up on the dusty rug. Dust was thrown up in the air. This room was old. For this amount of dirt, and by the decor, nobody had been in here for hundreds of years. It was dark, the only light coming from a chandelier above him. Candlelight only. Three candles.
A bookcase in one corner, a sideboard in another, the third corner was empty, the fourth had a chair with himself sitting in. The room got darker. Two candles left. Flickering.
He stood up. There were no footprints on the floor. How did he get here? Darker still. One candle. Flicker.
Get out. Head to the closest door. Where’s the door? Panic. Flicker. Darkness.
Trapped there by the nefarious Lucy no doubt, who’s available as an art print on my Threadless store… (Tenuous link, sorry! 🙂 )
“Honestly,” said Fuen, “I am not sure what everybody is.”
“I don’t follow,” sighed Hydra.
“OK, so this place,” explained Fuen. “It’s a crossing point, from the living world to the afterlife. It is in-between. When humans, animals, and even some plants die, they walk down the paths, to the main road, and follow it to the afterlife. But we live on here for a while. We are the ideas, opinions, hopes and dreams that linger after the living embodiment is gone.”
“So I am just an opinion?” asked Hydra.
“You’re a hope or a dream Hydra,” replied Yuffie. “That’s why we don’t let you play on the road.”
I know this story has been posted before, but this is a good starting point for Hydra’s story and it hasn’t been in a book yet.
“Yello Huffie,” said Raptor as Yuffie walked by.
“I give up!” yelled Bee. “All darned day!”
“What’s up?” asked Yuffie.
“Raptor is swapping the starts of words about all day today for charity,” said Bee.
“Cupid stunt,” sighed Yuffie.
“And then she said no,” laughed Yuffie, “she was menstruating!”
“Ladies,” sighed Fuen. “PMS jokes are not funny.”
“Period,” nodded Reala sagely.
Yuffie stifled a giggle.
Naughty joke, I know. Sorry! 🙂
“Sammy, baby.”
That’s what he always said before he came into her darkroom. She thought he knew better. Until she forgot to the lock the door before going to work.
She found him in the garage, car still running. She drove him to the loch, pushing the car off the bridge, a long walk home.
She slept well that night. Until her phone rang.
“Sammy, baby.”
You can find my collected horror stories in my second book, Capricorn. “Where can you buy Capricorn?” I hear you ask! Click on the links below to be taken to my Amazon pages.
USA Editions: http://amzn.to/2frKA6e
UK Editions: http://amzn.to/2y6t8v0
Cheers!
“Oh, Kraken,” yelled Red. “Mate, I got one for ya!”
“A fishy pun?” asked Kraken, grabbing a pen and paper.
“Yeah, it’s a good one,” said Red. “It’s about a fish with amnesia.”
“Right,” said Kraken.
“I’ve forgotten how it goes…” grinned Red.
“Oh no,” sighed Kraken.
“Well, you’re no Mario,” laughed Snake.
Sprite glared at Snake.
“Lost another job?” asked Fuen.
“Yeah, as a plumber,” sighed Sprite. “I found it draining.”
Little Fears 