Tales of humour, whimsy and courgettes
“Oh, for the love of…” she sighed.
Her husband stood at the door with his Bernie the Bear stuffed toy in his hand.
“Really?” she grumbled. “Aren’t you too old for that?”
“Yeah,” replied Bernie.
You can find my collected horror stories in my second book, Capricorn. “Where can you buy Capricorn?” I hear you ask! Click on the links below to be taken to my Amazon pages.
USA Editions: http://amzn.to/2frKA6e
UK Editions: http://amzn.to/2y6t8v0
Cheers!
“It was good while it lasted,” sighed Spider.
“What ya talking about?” asked Red.
“Spider says she once dated a snowman,” said Bones.
“What happened?” asked Red.
“Eh,” sighed Spider, “he had a meltdown.”
“He looks like a jerk,” said Serpent.
“Who?” asked Hydra.
“My chiropractor,” said Red.
“I bet he’s a lying and deceptive kinda guy,” said Serpent.
“Nah,” said Red, “he’s got my back.”
“Hannah,” Cassie called. “Time to stop playing now, dinner is ready!”
She was legendary at hide and seek, Cassie often thought she could vanish into thin air.
“Hannah!” Cassie yelled into the master bedroom.
A giggle replied, her shoes just visible.
“Got you!” Cassie cried, grabbing her feet, pulling her bloody stumps out from under the bed.
Dinner got cold.
You can find my collected horror stories in my second book, Capricorn. “Where can you buy Capricorn?” I hear you ask! Click on the links below to be taken to my Amazon pages.
USA Editions: http://amzn.to/2frKA6e
UK Editions: http://amzn.to/2y6t8v0
Cheers!
Sea-Monster waved around a placard.
“Whats that?” asked Yuffie.
“Protest placard,” said Sea-Monster, turning it out to reveal the word ‘Bad’ painted on it.
“Oh,” said Yuffie. “That’s not a good sign.”
Howdy! So you know the Little Fears have three books out now? January and Spiders are collections of our humorous tales, with Capricorn being our horror stories. All three books are available on Amazon.
USA Editions: http://amzn.to/2frKA6e
UK Editions: http://amzn.to/2y6t8v0
If you buy a copy and enjoy it, please don’t forget to leave a review.
Cheers!
“What was he doing?” asked Cloud.
“Smoking a bee,” replied Hydra.
“But, why?” asked Cloud.
“Not sure,” pondered Hydra. “Maybe he was trying to catch a buzz…”
Ahhhhahahaha, narffle, snort, hahaha! I know that one is super childish, but I love bees! If you don’t buzz off! Hehahehar!
“You know Jamie says we need to knock on his cupboard three times to keep the monsters in,” he said in a half question.
“Yeah,” she replied.
“Well I forgot a few days ago,” he said. “He started asking me to tap the toy trunk three times instead.”
“How odd,” she said.
“I know right,” he said. “Well, I tapped his cupboard last night by mistake.”
“And?” she asked.
“Tonight, he wants me to tap his head,” he said.
Originally published in the Little Fears presents – Book 2: Capricorn.
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Cheers!
“Hydra,” sighed Galaxy, “what are you doing?”
“Saving energy, doing my bit,” replied Hydra.
“How is that saving energy?” asked Galaxy.
Hydra forced the second brick beneath one side of the washing machine.
“Washing the clothes at 30 degrees,” said Hydra.
With this story I can confirm, not only is Hydra real but after the last spin cycle, my washing machine is now broken. Doh!
“How did it go?” asked Hydra.
“Not great,” sighed Shavings.
“What’s that?” asked Serpent.
“I entered a competition for original designs,” grumbled Shavings.
“Nice,” said Serpent.
“It would have been,” moaned Shavings. “Unfortunately they called this morning to say I didn’t make it.”
Hohoho! Shavings design was about as original as the punchline!
Dadaboomtish!
Want to help Shavings create an original design? Grab one of my books below and all profits from Amazon sales today will go
towards paying for a new shed for shavings!*
(*This might not be true, as Shavings is a fictional character doodled around a pencil shaving.)
Cheers!
“I got fired again,” sighed White.
“Didn’t you just get that job?” asked Black.
“Yeah,” sighed White. “Working at the ring doughnut factory.”
“What happened?” asked Black.
“Eh,” replied White, “I got fed up of the hole business…”
Doughnut! That’s how you spell it! Dough-nut! Shed off the corporate shills of Dunkin’ Donuts and be free to put more than one U into a word!
Disclaimer: I have never eaten a Dunkin’ Donut but with my massive sweet tooth, I would prolly like them.
(Insert related content and take that anti-pro Dunkin’ Donut (with an ugh) somewhere.)
Hey, if you’d like me to try a Dunkin’ Donut, you can buy my one of my books so I can put the earnings from my books into a doughnut eating fund!
Cheers!
Little Fears 