Tales of humour, whimsy and courgettes
“Oh, Kraken,” yelled Red. “Mate, I got one for ya!”
“A fishy pun?” asked Kraken, grabbing a pen and paper.
“Yeah, it’s a good one,” said Red. “It’s about a fish with amnesia.”
“Right,” said Kraken.
“I’ve forgotten how it goes…” grinned Red.
“Oh no,” sighed Kraken.
“Well, you’re no Mario,” laughed Snake.
Sprite glared at Snake.
“Lost another job?” asked Fuen.
“Yeah, as a plumber,” sighed Sprite. “I found it draining.”
“It was good while it lasted,” sighed Spider.
“What ya talking about?” asked Red.
“Spider says she once dated a snowman,” said Bones.
“What happened?” asked Red.
“Eh,” sighed Spider, “he had a meltdown.”
“He looks like a jerk,” said Serpent.
“Who?” asked Hydra.
“My chiropractor,” said Red.
“I bet he’s a lying and deceptive kinda guy,” said Serpent.
“Nah,” said Red, “he’s got my back.”
“God, I hate selling things on Gumtree and Craigslist,” sighed Fuen.
“What are ya selling?” asked Bug.
“Broken puppet,” replied Fuen.
“Oh aye,” said Bug, “no strings attached?”
Sea-Monster waved around a placard.
“Whats that?” asked Yuffie.
“Protest placard,” said Sea-Monster, turning it out to reveal the word ‘Bad’ painted on it.
“Oh,” said Yuffie. “That’s not a good sign.”
Howdy! So you know the Little Fears have three books out now? January and Spiders are collections of our humorous tales, with Capricorn being our horror stories. All three books are available on Amazon.
USA Editions: http://amzn.to/2frKA6e
UK Editions: http://amzn.to/2y6t8v0
If you buy a copy and enjoy it, please don’t forget to leave a review.
Cheers!
“What was he doing?” asked Cloud.
“Smoking a bee,” replied Hydra.
“But, why?” asked Cloud.
“Not sure,” pondered Hydra. “Maybe he was trying to catch a buzz…”
Ahhhhahahaha, narffle, snort, hahaha! I know that one is super childish, but I love bees! If you don’t buzz off! Hehahehar!
“Hydra,” sighed Galaxy, “what are you doing?”
“Saving energy, doing my bit,” replied Hydra.
“How is that saving energy?” asked Galaxy.
Hydra forced the second brick beneath one side of the washing machine.
“Washing the clothes at 30 degrees,” said Hydra.
With this story I can confirm, not only is Hydra real but after the last spin cycle, my washing machine is now broken. Doh!
“How did it go?” asked Hydra.
“Not great,” sighed Shavings.
“What’s that?” asked Serpent.
“I entered a competition for original designs,” grumbled Shavings.
“Nice,” said Serpent.
“It would have been,” moaned Shavings. “Unfortunately they called this morning to say I didn’t make it.”
Hohoho! Shavings design was about as original as the punchline!
Dadaboomtish!
Want to help Shavings create an original design? Grab one of my books below and all profits from Amazon sales today will go
towards paying for a new shed for shavings!*
(*This might not be true, as Shavings is a fictional character doodled around a pencil shaving.)
Cheers!
“I got fired again,” sighed White.
“Didn’t you just get that job?” asked Black.
“Yeah,” sighed White. “Working at the ring doughnut factory.”
“What happened?” asked Black.
“Eh,” replied White, “I got fed up of the hole business…”
Doughnut! That’s how you spell it! Dough-nut! Shed off the corporate shills of Dunkin’ Donuts and be free to put more than one U into a word!
Disclaimer: I have never eaten a Dunkin’ Donut but with my massive sweet tooth, I would prolly like them.
(Insert related content and take that anti-pro Dunkin’ Donut (with an ugh) somewhere.)
Hey, if you’d like me to try a Dunkin’ Donut, you can buy my one of my books so I can put the earnings from my books into a doughnut eating fund!
Cheers!
Little Fears 